Sorry for the “late” post. I got home later than usual for a Tuesday and have been relaxing in our very old leather chair by the window while rain pours down. It’d be lovelier if my head wasn’t hurting and wasn’t feeling feverish and had a looming performance tomorrow morning.

Hubs and I have put off grocery shopping for two days. I guess we’ll eat eventually. 🙂

I don’t really have anything important to post about and since I’m not up on my “outfit posts” I don’t have a stockpile of them to post when I don’t get dressed. But I actually did get dressed today and really wanted to take pictures of it but forgot when I was home before Jason. Oh well.

So instead of boring you with real life things, I’ll fill you in on what some of my goals are for this year.

I’ve never been one for New Year (why do people capitalize that?) resolutions. Why do I want to hype myself up to do something when I know I’m not going to do it? I’d rather ease my way into something and do it the right way. Like eating better, exercising daily again, and taking my schooling more seriously.

What am I doing to achieve those things, you ask? Well, a month ago I started the Couch to 5k program and so far I’ve done two days of it. No judging. At least now I have the desire to do it. I wouldn’t even have to if these stupid artificial hormones wouldn’t make me gain 20 pounds in two months. Geez.

As far as eating better… I eat vegetables… more than I used to. Before I got married I had this vision of me cooking healthy foods all the time and eating snacks and running with Jason. In real life it’s I-cook-whatever-I-want-and-have-no-motivation-to-run-anymore-because-I-already-got-married. Boom.

Taking my schooling more seriously hasn’t morphed into an action yet, but more of a desire. I think about practicing more but I really just don’t. I still wait until the night before to do all of my theory homework and to do all of my practicing. Bad habit? Yes. Oops. UT Tyler didn’t know what they were asking to come be a part of their school, did they?

Here. Look at this. I’ll be back tomorrow with *hopefully* a post with more pictures. But probably not.

Usually I like Wednesdays. They’re nice. They’re halfway through the week, they spell funny, and it lets me know I actually will make it through the week. But this week is particularly awful. I’ve been sick for the past two days and not wanting to even get out of bed. (Apparently once you’re married, when you get sick, you’re pregnant.) I was overloaded with a hunk of online class that came earlier in the week than usual, memorizing a 13 (THIRTEEN!) page aria for my voice lesson and trying to figure out what my homework is that’s due tomorrow. Oh, and our house is unfinished, the dishes are piled up, I can’t seem to start exercising and the sun is in my eyes. Ohhhh, woe is me.

Clearly I’m ready for this week to be over so I can spend time with my hubs and get back to normal.

Thankfully, last night I felt well enough to get up and make dinner for once. We bought a bunch of jumbo shrimp and I decided to whip up some fettucine of sorts. After browsing some recipes online, I just decided to wing it as I almost always do.

I ended up breaking out a sauce pan and pouring in some milk and the rest of the heavy cream we had. I melted about 3 cups of sharp white cheddar, 1/4 cup of goat cheese, and 1/2 cup of cream cheese. It turned out pretty well. I think I should’ve added pepper at least. I tried adding red pepper flakes but all that dairy just cancelled it right out.

No pic of the final product. Just picture the cheese all melty and shrimp all cookedy. And mixed together.

Oh. And I made a cake today. Wanna see? Sure you do.

I showed two views because I’m pretentious. And I just had to look up that word to see if I used it correctly. And I was. Boom.

Hope your Wednesday/week is going better than mine!

PS. Remember that audition I told you about? Well I made it into their scholarship choir. I have to decide whether or not I’m going to accept it by April 4. I wouldn’t be mentioning that unless I was thinking about not going. So, if you think about it, pray for clarity and guidance on the calling on my life!

Yesterday was my first day of my sophomore year of college. I hadn’t thought about the semester approaching at all because I’d been wrapped up in wedding plans all summer and having as much Jason-time as I possibly could before our schedules both got turned upside down. Surprisingly, I didn’t have any homework last night, but as with most first days comes a barrage of paperwork, books to buy and things to turn in. Though, I was extremely thankful to have all the same teachers and the encouraging friends to come back to!
SIDE NOTE: People may bash Kilgore College and make fun of it for being like “the 13th grade”, but as a music major, nothing about my classes is easy. It’s an INCREDIBLE school. (I’m speaking for the music department, mostly, but all of my professors-save one-have been incredible supporters of me and my education thus far!) Also, it’s cheap. And I mean cheap. END SIDE NOTE.

So, I already have a lengthy to-do list going by the time I got to work. I had spent my vacant 3 hours between school and work to clean house, hit the bookstore (which was a failure), have some lunch and enjoy what little downtime I had. When I eventually arrived to work I was just feeling overwhelmed, tired, sweaty and busy like my brain had no room to think about things I had to do right then. Thoughts of money, books, wedding and home were flitting around in there like nobody’s business. When I finally made myself relax what little I could I started to do some work. Walking around I noticed this song playing in my head:

For this purpose Christ was revealed:
To destroy all the works of the Evil One.
Satan has no authority here!
Powers of darkness must flee!
For CHRIST has the victory!

Over sin He has conquered Hallelujah! He has conquered!
Over death? VICTORIOUS! Hallelujah! Victorious!
Over sickness He has triumphed! Hallelujah! He has triumphed!

Jesus reigns over all!
Jesus reigns over all!

When I finally took a second to process those words and sink my teeth into them, so many things became clear to me.

1) Christ came here to conquer to destroy Satan. That was his purpose for God revealing Him to us.

2) Satan no longer has ANY authority here! He MUST flee because Christ has the victory! (I can barely type those words without standing and shouting in this tiny coffee shop! HALLELUJAH!!!)

3) Over sin, death, and sickness our Christ has conquered. And you know what?

4) Jesus reigns over all.

For a bit, I didn’t know how this song pertained to my current situation. But when I let that go, I realized, God was telling me, look, Melody. I revealed my Son to come down and defeat Satan for you. He no longer has a hold of your precious heart and soul. You’ve surrendered unto me and I have defeated those things in your life. Sickness, death, and sin no longer have that strong hold on you. I reign over all! So let your busy-ness subside because I reign over you. You no longer have to hold on to that.

And why would I?! Why would I hold on to those things that pull me under so deeply and suffocate me in their wake when my Jesus has defeated those things FOR GOOD!?

Even now, writing this blog, more and more is being revealed to me but so much is left uncovered. Throughout this summer, I’ve let God seriously and unashamedly, fall not only to the wayside, but off to the waaaaaaaaaayside. Like not even in the same zip code. Seriously. And those consequences have been so deadly and so severe I’ve honestly wondered what was happening to my consciousness. Was I going crazy? What was happening in my head? What IS happening in my head? My habits, my train of thought, my words, my everything were drastically changed. Not by my choosing, necessarily, but because I had let the Evil One come in and use my weaknesses to his advantage. He twisted the things I thought and made things seem worse than they were. Made my normal first day of school seem like the world was coming to an end. Made my to-do list seem like a mountain of tasks I could never accomplish, when in actuality, most of the things took care of themselves in a matter of a couple of days!

Jesus, I know, had been trying to reach me through song, radio, teaching, and friendship, but I didn’t listen. For the first time in my life I thought of God as the popular jock who only hung out with those of his own kind. Only with the ones who were seemingly perfect in all of their ways. I was like the outcast in His world. I didn’t see Him as a loving, caring God. I honestly thought He wouldn’t and didn’t want anything to do with me for my actions and my outright bold rebellion and laziness. But I see, faintly, that He is calling out to me. I mean come on! He put one of the greatest songs of all time in my head (because He knows I LOVE music) to get a hold of me. (Truth be told, I’ve always felt that I connect more sincerely and honestly with God through song. Be it old hymns, current tunes, or random melodies I sing in my heart.)

He loves me, you guys. And He loves you, too.

Yet, just because I write this blog and feel God reaching me, doesn’t mean this battle is over. God loves me, yes. But do I love him? I want Him to be my everything, my go-to guy when I’m ecstatic or wallowing in the valley screaming for someone to help me. Lately, I’ve mentally and emotionally been empty of the strength to say His name in conversation or even prayer. Lying in bed at night I wonder what happened. What day did I decide consciously I’d forget about Him and live life my way? But it wasn’t just one day. It was a string of days turning into weeks turning into the last 4 months turning into today then tomorrow and the next day. I’ve got a lot of questions. I’ve got a lot of heartache and healing to do. BUT, I do know the One who can do it for me.

Blessings,
Mel.

Hello! I’m on the school’s WiFi and let me tell you, it’s crazy slow.

Life is just sort of ambling on lately. Wish I had more to blog about!

Last night was our Chorale concert and we performed John Rutter’s Gloria from the mass, among other things. I’ve done a lot of Gloria’s in my days, what with being in All-Region choirs and just choirs in general. But this Gloria, was out of this world. I loved every measure of it. There wasn’t one note of it I didn’t just feel overwhelmed with praise and adoration for our Creator! We had timpani, snare, xylophone, trumpets, tubas and an organ. It was the most beautiful piece of music I have ever performed and I couldn’t help the tears welling up in my eyes during that song. When it was over there was a standing ovation and I couldn’t help but look around at my fellow performers and none of them seemed too impressed. I think they were more worried about just getting it over with and going out with their friends afterwards than they were living in the moment of that beautiful Gloria. Their faces were blank and unhappy. I felt like I was the only one smiling. I don’t care what we sounded like, it was the text of that song that I fell in love with from the beginning…

“Gloria in excels is Deo.” GLORY TO GOD!

Being a vocal major I can’t understand how an unsaved person could sing countless amounts of pieces written to praise the One True God and STILL not believe! All the oldest composers had to write about was CHRIST! (And anything written about something else was considered secular.) That in itself amazes me. God REALLY has been around FOREVER! And He always will be!

Nowadays secular music thrives over sacred music. Just looking at the number of Twitter followers MercyMe has compared to someone like A Fine Frenzy proves that. More people know about secular music stars because the media latches onto them and spills everything about their lives to us so we may live vicariously through them because our lives “aren’t good enough.”

Okay, I’m done rambling about that. Back to my original point. God should be glorified in the music that is made. After all, He is the one that gave those talents in the first place. Shouldn’t we be using them to praise Him?

Hope you guys have a great rest of the day!

Melody